PWS Life Lessons

#1: The difference between Judgment and Preference

   This is judgment: "That was a bad movie"
   This is preference: "I did not enjoy that movie"
   Your life will be happier and have more integrity if you avoid blaming and judging,
   and simply state your preference.

   When breathing properly, your stomach will do most of the moving. (in and out)
   It is especially important to breathe fully when feeling anxiety or stress.

   When preparing to argue with someone about something, make sure you understand their position.
   The best way to understand someone's position is to ask them (first).
   Extra credit: Explain your position AND their position when beginning to argue.

   Oddly enough, you will not be able to do everything. Books. Music. Friends. Hobbies.
   Time slips away... even in a given day.
   If you know what you want or like or must do... setting priorites is the main thing.

   When you get up to leave somewhere... a lunch table... an airport gate... a campsite...
   glance back just to see if you left something. Only takes a second, might save you a bundle.

   There is a quote in bronze at the entrance to my parents' subdivision in Marietta, GA that
   goes something like "There is no limit to what can be accomplished if no cares who gets the credit".
   People get all caught up in wanting the credit or praise for something, but true joy is found in
   giving and contributing and not worrying about who gets the credit.

   If you ever do something that you're ashamed of, and are feeling embarrassed or self-critical,
   please realize that it's a huge world out there, and billions of people have preceded you...
   and whatever you did has already been done by someone else. You're not the first, nothing to
   be ashamed of, you're a random human being who makes random mistakes now and then.

   Here is a quote: "The palest of inks is better than the best of memories"
   Bottom line: If you want to remember something, write it down!
   Alternate form of quote: The shortest pen beats the longest memory.

   If you don't follow lesson #8, then you'd better do something while you're thinking about it.
   If you put something off til another time... you might... uhh... what was I talking about?

   Normally an apostrophe indicates possession, as in "Paul's list of life lessons".
   But with I-T-S it's backwards. With I-T-S... possession does not use an apostrophe
   because the apostrophe is used to indicate the contraction "it is".
   When it comes to I-T-S, it's obvious that a lot of people don't know its correct use.

   For good balance, state your preference in addition to hearing the preferences of others.
   Not stating your preference is weak and denies your rights.
   Insisting on your preference is disrespectful of others.
   Putting forth the preferences of everyone involved allows the most challenging of human endeavors: integrating them

  Someone once told me to never expect the best from someone if they are cold, tired or hungry.
  To always give our best it is best to stay warm, rested and fed.

   Someone once told me to imagine others wearing a sign on their back that reads: "I'm hurting. Please be kind to me"
   And we usually compare our insides with other people's outsides.
   Chances are... everyone is dealing with something and deserves our compassion and kindness.

   The Financial Services Center at HP taught me that iteration is necessary for accuracy.
   Each day at 9:30AM they would review another's work from yesterday. "Wasted time", I thought.
   Then I realized that we are errant creatures. We make mistakes.
   Reviewing our work for accuracy is a necessary step in the process. Be humble.

   If someone asks me about my day, my week, my life... I relish the moment and am anxious to respond.
   Often I enjoy the spotlight so much that I revel in it. Now, I attempt to remind myself to ask
   the question back to my conversationalist... to give them the spotlight. Not always easy, but worth doing, I think.

   Software programmers know about this one. Keep a box in the corner of your closet... a recoverable stack.
   When you receive an invoice or statement that you will probably never need, put it in the box instead of throwing it away.
   Then, if the purchased item fails or the institution questions a transaction... you can recover the document and prove your case.

   Before going to someone for help to solve a problem, try a few things on your own.
   If none of them work, tell that someone what you have tried.
   This shows initiative and ownership, and you may not have to ask at all.

   If you're working on a project, take photos before your effort, and then afterward to compare and admire your work.
   "After" photos are much easier to remember!